How to Write the Perfect Groomsman / Best Man Speech

Writing a Groomsman or Best Man speech can be an intimidating task. After all, you’ve been asked to deliver a speech at one of the most important moments in your best friend’s life. But don’t worry—it’s not as difficult as it may seem! With a little preparation, some heartfelt words, and a sprinkle of humor, you can craft a memorable speech that will leave everyone smiling and maybe even shedding a few happy tears.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you write a best man speech that will stand out and make the groom proud.

Step 1: Understand Your Role

Before you start writing, it’s important to understand the purpose of the speech. As the Best Man or Groomsman, your primary role is to honor the groom, celebrate the couple, and add to the joy of the occasion. Your speech should be lighthearted, sincere, and respectful—aim to strike the right balance between humor and emotion.

What to Avoid:

  • Roasting the Groom: While a bit of humor is welcome, steer clear of embarrassing stories or anything that could make the groom (or anyone in the audience) uncomfortable. For example talking about the groom’s ex girlfriends or how wild he used to be. It is a big no-no.
  • Long-winded stories: Keep your speech concise—usually, around 5-7 minutes is ideal.
  • Unnecessary tangents: Stay focused on the groom and the couple.

Step 2: Start with an Introduction

Your opening should be warm and welcoming. Start by introducing yourself and explaining your connection to the groom. This helps set the tone and gives the audience context.

  • Introduce Yourself: “Good evening everyone. For those of you who don’t know me, my name is [Your Name], and I’ve had the privilege of knowing [Groom’s Name] for [X years].”
  • Thank the Hosts: If you’re speaking at a wedding reception, be sure to thank the couple and their families for hosting the event: “First off, I’d like to thank [Bride’s Name] and her family for putting together such a beautiful celebration.”

Step 3: Share a Personal Story

One of the best ways to connect with the audience is by sharing a personal, heartfelt story about the groom. Choose a story that shows his character or highlights your friendship. It could be from your childhood, a college experience, or a more recent adventure.

Tips for a Great Story:

  • Keep it positive: Share moments that showcase the groom’s best qualities—his kindness, humor, loyalty, or generosity.
  • Be specific: Instead of saying “he’s a great guy,” tell a story that illustrates why he’s great. For example, “I remember when [Groom’s Name] stayed up all night helping me with my last-minute project. I’ve never seen someone so dedicated… except for when he’s trying to convince people to watch his favorite TV shows.”
  • Avoid controversial or inappropriate anecdotes: Don’t share anything too personal or anything that could embarrass the groom.

Step 4: Celebrate the Couple

This is a wedding, so don’t forget to include the bride in your speech. Speak about how wonderful the couple is together, and how happy you are for them. This is your chance to express genuine excitement about their future.

For example:

  • “When [Groom’s Name] told me he met someone special, I could tell right away that this was different. And when I met [Bride’s Name], I knew exactly why—she’s kind, thoughtful, and an absolute perfect match for him.”
  • “Together, they make such an amazing team, and I can’t wait to see the incredible journey they’ll have together.”

Step 5: Add Some Humor

A wedding speech wouldn’t be complete without a little laughter! Light humor can keep the mood relaxed and fun, but be mindful of the tone and keep it appropriate. Funny stories, quirky observations about the couple, or playful jokes about the groom’s past can all work.

For example:

  • “I’ve known [Groom’s Name] for years, and I can honestly say I never thought I’d see the day when he’d settle down. But here we are. He’s found someone who can put up with his terrible puns and obsession with [insert quirky hobby or interest].”
  • Or, “I’m so happy for you both, though I do have one concern—who’s going to take the lead on assembling Ikea furniture now?”

A Word on Humor:

Humor is a great tool, but don’t go overboard. Avoid inside jokes that only a few people would get, and steer clear of humor that could be misconstrued as mean-spirited.

Step 6: Offer a Toast

Once you’ve shared your stories and words of celebration, it’s time to wrap up your speech with a toast. Raise your glass to the newlyweds and offer your best wishes for their future.

For example:

  • “To [Bride’s Name] and [Groom’s Name]—may your lives be filled with love, laughter, and countless adventures. To the happy couple!”

Step 7: Practice, Practice, Practice

Once you’ve written your speech, don’t just read through it once and call it a day. Practice delivering it multiple times to ensure you’re comfortable with the content and flow. You want to sound natural and confident—not like you’re reading off a piece of paper.

  • Time yourself: Make sure you stay within a reasonable timeframe—usually about 5-7 minutes.
  • Practice in front of a mirror: This will help you get used to making eye contact and moving around naturally.
  • Get feedback: If you’re comfortable with it, practice in front of a friend or family member to get constructive feedback.

Step 8: Stay Calm on the Big Day

The day of the wedding is finally here. Here are some tips to help you keep calm and deliver your speech with confidence:

  • Breathe deeply: Take a few deep breaths before you step up to the microphone. It’ll help calm your nerves.
  • Smile: A warm smile goes a long way in putting both you and your audience at ease.
  • Keep your notes handy: It’s okay to have your speech written out or on your phone, but try to only glance at it as needed—this will help you sound more natural and engaged.
  • Focus on the couple: Remember, your speech isn’t about you. Keep your attention on the bride and groom, and speak from the heart.

Final Thoughts

Writing a Best Man or Groomsmen speech is your chance to show your love and appreciation for your best friend and celebrate the couple’s new chapter in life. By following these steps and putting in the effort to craft a meaningful, heartfelt speech, you’ll make a lasting impression on the bride, groom, and their guests.

Remember, a great speech doesn’t need to be perfect—it just needs to be sincere and memorable. So relax, enjoy the moment, and raise a glass to love, friendship, and happiness!

Good luck, and may your speech be one that people talk about for years to come.

 

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Read more: How to write a Maid of Honour speech.